Delirium
by epicfrenchfry
Summary: It started off as a normal fight, but gravity takes it toll and lands both Shizuo and Izaya in the hospital with critical injuries. When they wake up, Shizuo is suffering brain damage and has lost all memory of Izaya. Eventual Shizaya
1. Chapter 1

**Overall Disclaimer: I do not own Durarara!. Ryohgo Narita does. All I own is a copy of the DVD and manga.**

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**Chapter 1**

It was such a nice night. Too bad he couldn't enjoy it.

"IZAYAAAAA-KUN!" A beast-like roar echoed through the streets followed by hysterical laughter.

"Catch me if you can, Shizu-chan~" The lithe informant giggled as he jumped off a dumpster and onto a fire escape. He paused for a second to allow his pursuer to catch up before dashing up the metal steps. The flimsy stairs quaked as Shizuo stomped up after him.

"Izayaaa-kun!" He rumbled dangerously, mocha eyes narrowed in determination behind purple shades. Izaya reached the top and looked around before spotting a possible escape and climbing several feet onto the roof. He ran to the corner and cursed. Not only did the railings come up to his chest, but the nearest building roof was well over 7 feet away.

"Looks like I'll have to fight." Izaya muttered to himself, drawing his switchblade and brandishing it threateningly. The monster approached at a steady pace. Izaya turned to face him and plastered a wide smirk across his face as he backed up until his back hit the railing.

"Izayaaaa-kun!" Shizuo roared. He finally had him cornered! He lunged to grab him but the slippery bastard dodged under his outstretched arm and pranced away laughing.

"You'll have to be quicker than that, Shizu-chan!" He teased. But as he said it there was a metallic smashing noise as Shizuo skidded right through the railing along the edge, his momentum rendering him unable to stop himself. Shrieks rose from the streets below, passersby preparing to witness the worst.

"Izaya!" He cried, desperately this time. Izaya wasn't sure why but he dashed forward and grabbed his hand, pulling him up a few inches, but the weight of his enemy worked against him.

"You're too heavy!" Izaya screamed through the wind. Shizuo's eyes widened as he slipped some more and there were more screams from below. Izaya tightened his grip on both Shizuo's hand and the broken railing, tugging uselessly as he tried to pull him back up.

"Izaya!" He begged, genuinely terrified for the first time in his life. He had been scared many times before but this was his first time experiencing pure and unadulterated terror, the kind that boiled in his stomach and made his heart pound so loudly that it echoed in his skull. Izaya's grip on the railing slipped, slicing open his palm. Blood oozed out, coating his hand and making him slip even more.

Izaya grit his teeth and let go of the railing, jerking forward before he steeled himself, grabbing Shizuo's forearm with his bloodied hand. He tried in vain to pull him up but Shizuo's shirt started to tear. Izaya attempted to get a new hold but the blood coating his hand slicked over Shizuo's arm, making it impossible.

The blond fell even more, pulling Izaya with him. "Just let me go!" He begged.

"No!" Izaya shouted furiously. "I'm not letting go, how dare you say that! You can't die like this!" No. Shizuo had to go down in a blaze of fury, brought down by Izaya, not gravity.

"I won't die! Just let me go!"

"How can you say that you won't die? Maybe you won't, but getting hit by a truck still stuns you! Falling from this height could put you in a coma, if you didn't die." Izaya's voice fell to a whisper so that Shizuo couldn't hear him. "I can't lose you."

But Izaya kept sliding forward until he was right on the very edge. The few inches he had managed to pull him up were quickly lost. Izaya looked nervously behind him as his grip loosened ever so slightly. Maybe Shizuo was right. Maybe he should just let him fall, just let this whole thing go. He could let his precious monster fall from his grip and break on the pavement far below, and he could walk away unscathed. Nobody would blame him if Shizuo fell. The blond's friends would try, but the blame just wasn't his.

Shizuo screamed as he fell even farther, and it was this sound, this wonderfully human sound that made Izaya stretch down as far as he could and grab his shirt. The fabric tore in his fist and Shizuo finally fell.

Maybe it was idiotic- no, it was, it definitely was, but Izaya didn't let go. He let himself be pulled over the edge, the wind whistling in his ears as they plunged. Izaya screwed up his face against the certain death looming before him as the pavement rapidly grew closer.

Pedestrians screamed as though they were the ones about to die. Izaya wanted to scream too but was paralyzed with fear. He didn't want to die!

The next thing he knew strong arms wrapped around him, Shizuo's body drawing him into a tight embrace like a cocoon and shielding him from the full force of the blow as the next second they hit the ground. Shizuo couldn't even scream; all that escaped him was a sound akin to that of a kicked puppy before he knew no more.

The world spun around him as Izaya tried to stand but he had barely risen to his knees before he collapsed into unconsciousness, a sticky pool of their conjoined blood growing around them.

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**My first published Durarara story! Yay! This first chapter was short, and so is the next one, but I am attempting to write longer chapters. Second chapter should be up extremely soon, since it's already written and just undergoing some edits. See you~**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

When Izaya next opened his eyes, he was in a hospital with a white-clad doctor standing next to his bed.

"Oh good, you're awake." The doctor looked up

"How long was I out?" Izaya demanded as he sat up and instantly was reeling in pain, head pounding and the dizziness making his vision swim.

"Be careful, Orihara-san." The doctor warned. "You were unconscious for three months."

"Three months..." Izaya inwardly groaned as he imagined how much work had piled up. "What's wrong with me?"

"Well Orihara-san, you broke both of your legs, your right arm, and nearly all of your ribs. You are also suffering from severe internal bleeding." Izaya's doctor read off of a plastic clipboard before looking up at him, adjusting his glasses professionally. Izaya grimaced but he couldn't deny that he had gotten off quite easily. The newest question was right on the tip of his tongue but he couldn't bring himself to ask it. Luckily the doctor was able to guess what he wanted to know. "Heiwajima-san broke nearly every bone in his body and has excessive internal bleeding. In fact, his skull was the least damaged and that suffered a severe fracture that resulted in brain damage. He is still in a coma at the moment, but if he wakes up he may not be the same person you knew."

Izaya stared at him. "What are you saying?"

"Heiwajima-san most likely will have amnesia and may have lost that inhuman strength of his. Or he might be even stronger. We won't be able to tell unless he wakes up."

"He's going to wake up! He won't die like this!" Izaya insisted. He knew he was in denial. He knew the odds were against his dear monster, but his Shizu-chan wouldn't allow himself to die in a hospital after such a stupid accident. 'He might not be the same monster you hated,' a snide voice in his head reminded him. Izaya stared up at the ceiling. "Shizu-chan will wake up." He said stubbornly.

The doctor sighed. "We'll see, Orihara-san." Then he tucked he plastic clipboard under his arm and exited the room. Izaya waited until he felt the doctor was a safe distance away before rising from his bed, stumbling and swearing as pain coursed through his aching body but he persevered to the door, limping out into the hallway with the assistance of a pair of crutches he found leaning against the wall next to his bed. This was the emergency ward, so Shizu-chan should be close.

Lo and behold, Shizuo's room was right next to his own. Izaya opened the door quietly and crutched his way inside. The blond was hooked up to all sorts of machines, including a respirator. Izaya tore his eyes away from the heart wrenching sight and picked up the clipboard next to his bed.

"Oh, Shizu-chan…" Izaya murmured. "Stupid protozoan. Falling off that building was quite silly of you." He set the clipboard back down and sat in the plastic chair next to the bed. He wouldn't admit that he had allowed himself to fall as well.

The chair was warm and there were fresh flowers on the table, so Izaya made the safe assumption that someone had just left. Maybe it was Celty and Shinra, or his boss and that weird coworker of his. Honestly, he couldn't care less. He just wanted his monster to wake up.

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**Eugh this is shorter than my school essays :P Chapter three is being written though and will be much longer than this pitiful excuse of a chapter, so hang tight!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

"So how are you feeling?" Shinra asked eagerly. "You've been awake for a day now, right?"

"Fine." Izaya lied. "I'm alive, aren't I? And that stupid protozoan probably won't ever wake up! I'm feeling great!" He laughed, ignoring the jabbing pain in his sore ribs.

'I know you're lying.' Celty shoved her PDA in his face.

"I would never lie to you! Really, I feel wonderful." Izaya grimaced to himself. She must have sensed his discomfort.

'Not about that. About Shizuo.' She replied.

Izaya's face grew deadly serious. "I assure you, I harbor no hidden feelings. That monster means nothing to me and the day he finally dies will be the best day of my entire life."

'Then why did you try to save him? You could have just let him fall, so why did you let yourself fall too? You wouldn't risk your life for someone you hate. I don't think it's really hate you feel towards Shizuo.'

Izaya hated Celty. He hated her logic. He hated how she always saw right through him. "And what would you know about human emotions? You're a monster yourself, aren't you?" He sneered.

Shinra gasped. "Izaya!" He cried, coming between then and ushering Celty away. From her body language Izaya could tell that she was more annoyed with him than hurt by what he said, but either Shinra didn't see that or he just ignored it. Izaya guessed it was probably the latter. "Izaya! You apologize right now!"

"Sorry, sorry..." Izaya waved it off uncaringly. "You know, Shinra, if you shield her so much Celty will never progress in our world."

"She doesn't need to." Shinra insisted.

"But what will happen when you die? What will we do then without her beloved there to protect her?" Izaya knew that she was perfectly capable of protecting herself. She was a centuries-old creature of legend, after all. But it was just so fun to toy with the two of them, and it had been so long since he was able to that he just couldn't help himself. Watching Shinra puff himself up in anger with Celty flitting about trying to calm him down was just too amusing to pass up.

"I'll find out a way to live forever!" Shinra decided.

"If you do, then let me know." Izaya said. "What did you even come here for?"

"You're my friend, no matter how evil and twisted you are!" Shinra beamed. "Celty heard that you woke up and we both wanted to see you!"

Izaya's skeptical gaze slid past Shinra to Celty, who shrugged. 'I wouldn't have much of a job without you, and then I wouldn't be able to buy Shinra presents.' She typed.

"I'm glad I'm so useful." Izaya said dryly.

'Don't act so hurt... It makes it seem like you care.' Celty typed in what Izaya could only interpret as a haughty attitude.

"Ouch, Celty! That hurts! What if I do care? That could have seriously hurt my feelings." Inside, Izaya was growing bored with this conversation. They were going in circles; he could easily predict what Celty would say-or rather, type- next. Normally he liked that about his humans, so easily predictable, but Celty wasn't human. She wasn't supposed to be like this, she was supposed to be like his monster and surprise him every step along the way.

She shook with silent laughter and now he felt genuinely insulted. If he hadn't been confined to his bed after his visit to Shizuo yesterday, he would have acted on his wounded pride and escorted them out. Shinra cooed over the 'cute' Dullahan and Izaya sighed, tilting his head back and staring up into the fluorescent light bulbs.

He was feeling the itch of restlessness already. He needed to get back to work quickly. If not, he was likely to go insane cooped up in here. "Hey, Shinra?"

"Hm?"

"The next time you come... Do you think you could bring me some otoro?"

Shinra laughed. Apparently something about his perfectly normal request was humorous. "Sure thing, Izaya. Glad to see you're feeling a bit better." He made a movement to pat his shoulder but clearly thought better of it, seeing the thick layer of bandages on his arm. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Bye." Izaya watched them leave, Celty waving slightly to him before she hightailed it out the door. He smiled wryly at her blatantly obvious distaste for him. Oh well. He didn't really need her to approve of him. It's not like a whole lot of people did anyways. One domesticated Dullahan wouldn't make much of a difference.

Once they were gone and he was alone again, he gingerly turned onto his side and stiffly stretched his leg out in front of him. Pain shot up his spine and he grimaced. Something told him that performing his usual flawless parkour would be a lot harder now, even after he made his full recovery. Of course, he may not even need it. There were no guarantees that Shizu-chan would wake up.

A brash knock on the door interrupted his thoughts, drawing a sigh from him. He could already foretell what this was all about. Sure enough, his doctor entered the room. "Orihara-san? It's time for your treatments."

"Joy." Izaya muttered. The doctor smiled apologetically and advanced.

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**Gah I'm so sorry this chapter was super boring X( I suck. This chapter was so annoying to write though so I'm just glad it's done and over with. It all dialogue and nothing happens which I don't really like but I was sick of deciding I was done, asking my friend for approval, being scolded for its shortness, and going back and trying to think of more useless crap to add in.**

**Izaya and Shinra's interactions are fun, I liked writing them. From what little we saw of their friendship in the anime and manga, they tease and make fun of each other a lot so I had a ball with that. Celty clearly does not like Izaya one bit but still does his jobs, and in the second season she is shown to enjoy buying presents for Shinra so I improvised a bit in expanding their relationship and how they kind of reluctantly rely on each other for their respective jobs. And why is it that whenever I write Izaya he is an extremely sarcastic smartass? Is it because I'm a sarcastic smartass? I'm pretty sure he wasn't this sarcastic in the anime or manga, though he is a smartass. I need to work on that.**

**Ignore my meaningless ramblings on trying to explain how my mind works. While I was writing this chapter, I took a long break and started chapter 4, got about halfway through and then started chapter 5 and got a few paragraphs into that. Chapter 4 should be out within the next week if I keep up the pace I'm working at for it, but I'm warning you don't keep your fingers crossed because I am a lazy sack of poop. **


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

Something really hurt. The black void seemed to get darker, swallowing him up as the bodiless pain increased. Through it all a tiny white light became visible, tempting him forward. He went towards it eagerly in hope of escaping from this black nothingness. The light grew larger, growing into a blinding white and suddenly a cacophony of voices surrounded him, chattering incessantly. Shapeless and unfamiliar faces swam above him. His eyes shut again to block it all out. 'How did I end up back here?' He thought morosely. 'Please stop. Leave me alone.' The voices wouldn't shut up.

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"Shizuo woke up this morning."

"Hm. Too bad." Izaya sighed, but inside he was jumping for joy. Shinra rolled his eyes.

"You don't have to pretend, I know you're happy about it." Shinra smiled knowingly.

"Why would I be happy about the fact that the monster is alive?" Izaya knew he was being silly in challenging Shinra like this. The doctor knew him too well.

"You would be too bored without him around." Shinra never failed to live up to his expectations.

"I could always find a new game to play... There are plenty of monsters in this world." His gaze lingered on Celty for a brief moment and she bristled angrily before he looked away.

"I brought the sushi you asked for." Shinra interjected hurriedly, holding up the Russia Sushi bag.

"Ooh, thanks!" Izaya reached for it excitedly. His mouth watered in desperate anticipation of the tasty delight. The hospital's pathetic excuse for food was disgustingly bland. He couldn't wait for the delicious fatty tuna to flood his mouth with its savory goodness.

"Hold it." Shinra held the treasure trove just out of Izaya's reach. "Apologize to Celty first. You've been mean to her."

"I'm sorry for calling you a monster Celty! Give it to me, Shinra!" Izaya scowled, glowering at his annoyingly smug doctor friend.

"Here." Shinra relented, handing him the sushi delicacy. Izaya dug in with great gusto, and as he ate Shinra informed him of Shizuo's condition- after all, an uninformed informant was a very sad thing. "He's suffering from temporary dysarthria and mild amnesia. He's healing well, as expected, but he's not eating and seems really out of it, like he just disconnected from the rest of the world. Really Izaya, you're lucky Shizuo cares about you."

Izaya scoffed. "You think that monster cares about me?"

"Well, of course. He's spent all these years chasing you, but not once has he caught you. If he really wanted to, he could kill you in a heartbeat. The same can be said for you too, actually. And he protected you, didn't he? That's what eyewitnesses said. They say he shielded you just before you hit the ground. You'd be dead if he didn't do that."

Izaya didn't respond. He knew that everything Shinra had just said was one hundred percent correct. It would have been easier than lifting a finger for him to arrange for Shizuo to be assassinated. He just never did it. Why? He wanted to do it himself. He wanted to be the one to bring down Shizuo, it was a mutual unspoken agreement of theirs. It had to be by his hands.

So why had he never made a move to kill him, only to injure and annoy? Why had Shizuo never hit him with those ridiculously heavy projectiles he hurled at him? It wasn't that the beast had an awful aim because he hit every one of his other targets with spot on accuracy. Just not him, never did he hit Izaya except for that one trash can. But it was a trash can. There was a vending machine several feet away... why did he not go for that instead? Why did he grab the trash can?

Because it wouldn't hurt him. Izaya was pretty durable, he prided himself on that fact, but a vending machine would have brought him down. The trash can merely knocked him over several feet and behind that bloodthirsty grin Shizuo looked thrilled. Shizuo didn't really want him dead. And apparently neither did Izaya want Shizuo dead. But what of it? Why was Izaya putting thought thought into it? Why was this so damn important to him? Why the hell did he care so much? Why did Shizuo affect him like this?

"Izaya?" Shinra asked cautiously.

"I want to see him." Izaya said emotionlessly.

"Are you sure? Why?"

"I don't know, I just… do." Izaya fibbed. He would never tell Shinra the truth, that he wanted to make sure, to see for himself that Shizuo was alive and doing well.

"I don't think that's a good idea." Shinra said, looking at Celty uncomfortably. Izaya ignored him, sitting up and grabbing his crutches. He hobbled past them, Shinra's protests feeble as the doctor was hesitant to touch him lest he further agitate Izaya's injuries. Instead he followed after him like an anxious puppy not wanting to be left behind. "Izaya, I'm not joking. It's for the best that you don't see him for a while."

The water was running as Shinra sighed and opened the door for him. Izaya hobbled to the small bathroom and pushed the slightly ajar door open the rest of the way. Shizuo was bent over the sink dying his hair back to the blonde it was before the accident; his natural dark brown had grown out while he was unconscious. A pair of scissors and the locks of hair that surrounded his feet and littered the basin suggested he had given himself a haircut as well. Judging from the choppy style, it wasn't a very good one.

"Shizu-chan!" Izaya exclaimed excitedly. Adrenaline pulsed through his veins. Any second now Shizuo would see him, rage would course through that deceptively lean body and he would roar with beast-like fury, tearing the sink from the wall and hurling it at him while screaming his name...

The sharp brown gaze regarded him blankly. He was silent for a bit as water from his hair dripped steadily to the floor before he spoke in a voice rough and scratchy from disuse. "Who are you?"

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**Yay Shizuo's awake! Too bad he doesn't remember Izaya.**

**Chapter five is about 1/4 of the way done, so it'll be out soon! Until then~**


	5. Chapter 5

**Okay, first off I want to say thank you SO MUCH to everyone who has favorited, followed, reviewed, or even just enjoyed my story so far. You have no idea how happy it makes me when I receive an email notification about this story because I know that it means that somebody out there likes my work. 17 reviews for 4 chapters... that is amazing and the best part about this (to me at least) is that this is one of the few chaptered stories I have that I actually really like and have fun writing. So updates for this are a lot faster than anything for any of my other stories because 1) I actually have a vague plot in mind rather than just winging it 2) I genuinely adore this story and love writing it.**

**Sorry for the enormous author's note. If you haven't skipped this, you can start reading now :)**

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**Chapter 5**

His condition was worsening. The dark brown roots of his hair were becoming apparent again and the part that remained bleach blond had lost its healthy luster. His mocha brown eyes were dull and his cheeks were sunken in. He looked like a walking corpse and he didn't even care.

Izaya could see all of this happening and the idea that he could do nothing about it was maddening. He sat at his bedside and pleaded with him as Shizuo lot another cigarette. "Please!" He cried.

"I don't see why you care so much. I don't even know you." Shizuo said gruffly.

"We've known each other for seven years, Shizu-chan." Izaya reminded him in a pained voice. He was met only with a blank stare. "Don't you remember? You hate me- you keep trying to kill me! You can't have just forgotten all about that! Shizuo Heiwajima, don't you DARE forget about me!" His voice had risen into a hysterical scream, an ugly noise hurtful to his pride, but he had more pressing matters to deal with.

"Look, I don't know you, so just-" he said testily.

"I HATE-" love "-YOU!" He howled suddenly, cutting off Shizuo. The blond barely had time to look confused before the raven-haired man stormed out.

Izaya leaned against the shut door, breathing deeply. He had just lost his temper with Shizuo. That wasn't good, he needed to compose himself. All of this was pointless if he was just going to shout at him. He glanced down at his leg in irritation as the muscles seized for the third time in the past ten minutes. He had been released a week ago after being held in the hospital for another month after his awakening, but he was still having troubles with it.

He'd been working with Shizuo for almost five weeks now but still the blond refused to remember him. The only way Shizuo knew him now was as the stranger that continually harassed him. He knew his name from the countless times Izaya had told him it, but that was all. Trying to get through to him was hopeless, Izaya wasn't even sure why he tried.

Shizuo was a completely changed man. In all the time that had passed since he woke up, he hadn't lost his temper once. He remained calm and quiet, rarely speaking. He had adopted a perpetual brooding attitude and the atmosphere around him was dark and pensive. It had become so hard to be near him that even Shinra didn't like to visit. Despite this, Izaya often saw the doctor leaving Shizuo's room. His cheerful friend always had a solemn look on his face.

Izaya probably looked much the same way, as miserable as he was. Walking the streets of Ikebukuro, he passed many of his precious humans but none of them struck the same chord within him that Shizuo had. His world had become boring without the bodyguard there to keep him busy, chasing and screaming after him.

He told himself that that was the only reason he tried to restore him, not because he missed him. Shizuo was his favorite pawn and he wanted him back.

Bullshit.

He was a liar, not only to everyone around him but to himself as well. And he'd been thinking this a lot. He limped to the stairs but didn't even make it halfway down before his injured leg seized and he fell with an undignified squawk. He only stopped himself from falling all the way down by grabbing the railing. His crutch clattered down the stairs to the landing. Izaya stared down at it as he tried to catch his breath and rubbed his wrenched shoulder. As he slowly stood up, he tried to ignore the burn of humiliation in his face and hobbled down the stairs to retrieve it.

Shizuo was doing this to him. Shizuo was turning him into a fool, maybe even a lovesick one. Because there was no denying it now, he was in love with that stupid brute and he'd be damned if he let Shizuo lose his memories of him forever. Yes, Izaya thought to himself with a grim smile of self-satisfaction. He would fix Shizuo if it was the the last thing he did.


	6. Chapter 6

**Heyy I'm back. Yup, I'm trash. Sorry. Here's a pathetically short chapter as an apology.**

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Chapter 6

Shizuo lay quietly in bed thinking to himself about the events that had just transpired. That man, Izaya, had gotten so upset with him. That seemed to happen a lot. Every day he would come and sit, sometimes talking to him and sometimes sitting in silence. Shizuo liked the silent visits better. He didn't particularly enjoy the stranger's company, he much preferred Shinra's, but he was tolerable when he was quiet. His incessant insistences that Shizuo knew him were annoying and more than half of the time he felt an odd but somehow familiar throb in his muscles, his brain whispering malevolently to him to throw the annoying bastard out the window.

Still, somehow he felt that maybe the flea – where had that nickname come from?– was right, maybe he did know him. He was probably a victim of his monstrosity, come back to force him to remember his crimes.

Shizuo lit another cigarette, knowing the nurse would smell it and come in to scold him again, but he was so desperate for the company of someone who wasn't afraid of him that he didn't care. The bitter taste of tobacco and smoke filled his mouth for only a second before he crushed it in his fist and let the powder sprinkle onto his hospital gown. Not even that could distract him, it seemed. The stranger named Izaya was weighing too heavily on his mind.

Shizuo turned onto his side and gazed out the window next to his bed. Weak sunlight filtered through a gap in the dark gray clouds, hinting at an end to the drizzling rain pattering against the glass panes. A rainbow would be forming soon, a bright outlook to a previously bleak existence.

Could the same be said for him? Could this blank void in his head be filled with the images and words he so longed for? This man who talked like he knew him informed him a little of who he was, or rather who he used to be. The Shizuo Heiwajima he spoke of did ring a faint bell inside of him. However, he could only vaguely recall who this was, and he knew that this was him, but he didn't feel like that man anymore. He supposed the tingling in his muscles was the monstrous strength Izaya talked about at large. He could make a connection to him through that, remember little flashes of instances where he had used it against him, but these fleeting memories didn't add up and he tended to ignore them, believing they were snippets of a dream he'd had.

He watched the rain as it came to a halt, and remained still and silent for another hour as the sky gradually cleared up until the sun shone brightly and there was only a slight trace of the downpour that had transpired, left behind in the remaining wetness and small puddles on rooftops. He was right, there had been a rainbow. It was blurry and hard to make out, just like the haze in his mind.

The haze was enough to occupy him for the next few hours and into the evening. He lay still, staring out the window and attempting to puzzle through his thoughts, most of them too complex for him to even understand.

He didn't sleep that night, too absorbed in the thoughts circulating ceaselessly in his head. He stared lifelessly out the small window, turning onto his back to look at the ceiling at some point past midnight. The hours of the night wasted away and dawn broke, casting weak strands of sunlight filtering through the window. The day progressed bit by bit. His nurse entered the room, attempted to get him to speak to her and answer some questions, and shorty gave up and left again. Another hour dragged on by.

The door swung open and he raised his eyes to look. His visitor was none other than Izaya, looking rather down for such a boisterous man. He regarded Shizuo through sullen eyes as he approached and sat in the chair next to him. He looked down at his hands folded in his lap and spoke in a voice ridden with regret. "I'm sorry I snapped at you, Shizu-chan. I just..." He sniffed and a lone tear dribbled down his cheek. "I'm just so upset... Because you don't remember me. We were dating, you see."

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**Heehee XD Izaya has a plan! Chapters 7 and 8 are under production.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hello! Today is the third anniversary of my presence on this website and to celebrate I am updating everything that hasn't been completed!**

**However, this chapter is short and sucky.**

**I do not own Durarara.**

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**Chapter 7**

He didn't like lying to him.

No really, he didn't.

Okay, maybe he did a little. But Izaya had to do it in order to fix him, properly fix him. He would give Shizuo his memories back, but they would be memories that he fashioned for him. He would style Shizuo into the perfect pet, his very own tamed monster. And he would love him, just like a proper human should. Shinra would argue that it was wrong, and that he should leave Shizuo to heal on his own. Celty would toss in the spiteful reminder that humanity hated him.

He didn't care. When had he ever cared? When had he ever done the right thing? In his mind, in his own twisted sense of right and wrong, his goals were right. What he was doing was going to fix Shizuo and mold him into a perfect beast.

He watched Shizuo with a cool and calculating gaze. The blonde was sleeping, and he looked so peaceful it pissed Izaya off. A proper monster should be a raving beast, one satiated only with blood attained through pain and destruction. He watched him silently for another few minutes before Shizuo began to stir, blinking open those dark brown eyes and staring perplexedly at him.

"I-Izaya?" He murmured, still half asleep. Izaya maintained a deadpan expression, refusing to admit to himself how his heart throbbed almost painfully at Shizuo's behavior. His morning voice was husky, almost sultry. "What are you doing here? It's 5 in the morning..." He asked wearily, casting a quick glance at the clock on the wall.

"I snuck in." Izaya replied cheerily. "Because I missed you so much!"

Shizuo looked a little guilty. It was understandable; he'd been distraught the night before over his 'lost' memories when Izaya spun his little tale of how they met in high school, fell in love, and started dating. Izaya had even let a few crocodile tears fall free just to make his own heartbreak that much more realistic, and it worked. Shizuo had looked absolutely disgusted with himself for losing the memories of things hat had never occurred..

Izaya reached out and placed his hand over Shizuo's with a forced smile so bright it physically pained him. "How are you feeling?"

Shizuo let out a dry chuckle. "No different than last night."

"I was hoping you felt better." Izaya said with a fake little pout, feeling the scrap of dignity he still possessed slipping away.

Shizuo frowned. He seemed to be deep in thought, almost brooding. There was a long silence, during which Izaya grew bored and watched the sun gradually rise in a swirled blend of pink and gold through the small window. Paper thin tendrils of fluffy white clouds littered the fuchsia sky.

"Everything you tell me, about... us..." Shizuo paused, brow furrowing in pensive contemplation. "I feel like I know it, like the memories are still there only locked away inside my brain just out of my reach. Yet at the same time they seem so surreal. It's like looking through a textured glass window. Even though you know what it is you're supposed to be seeing, its all so warped and distorted, so altered that it doesn't seem right. I believe you, and I trust you, because what reason would you have to lie to me? But I just... It just..." He sighed and shook his head firmly. "No, it's too early. I'm sorry."

Izaya was completely still, rendered speechless by Shizuo's little spiel. Several things were spiraling through his head, but the most prominent was the most appalling to him. Since when had the brainless beast possessed the mental prowess to think such thoughts? For a protozoan such as Shizuo, it really was quite impressive. Izaya had to wonder if this sudden new mental strength had anything to do with the brain damage he had received. It probably did. Perhaps the near-death experience had changed something within him, or the blow had knocked the stupidity out of him. Either way, Izaya could have fun with this Shizuo, fun he could not have had with the old one. And he fully intended to take advantage of that. After all, if he could make Shizuo into a perfect human, then he would have no qualms about loving him like he did. And he hated going against his own morals.

Wait.

Love? Did he love Shizuo? He must, for he had been feeling these emotions now for five years. He had always shunted them aside and ignored them, overpowering the odd feeling that he couldn't identify with the hatred that he knew and was used to.

Now that he was coming to terms with it, Izaya found himself for the first time in his life at a loss for words. He was utterly clueless on to what to do, and he especially despised this sort of rare situation. And of course, it was Shizuo who had put him into it. Even having lost his memories, the monster was still capable of screwing up his plans. How typical of him, Izaya thought with an annoyed roll of his eyes.

Shizuo spoke up again, "The doctor said last night that I would be released tomorrow."

Izaya turned a raised-eyebrow look on him. "Really?" He inquired skeptically.

Shizuo nodded, a little doubtful himself. "They were so against letting me leave a few days ago. I wonder what changed their mind?"

Izaya shrugged, masking his smug smirk with a pleased smile. He, of course, was responsible for the doctors' sudden change of mind. "Good thing they are. We had a dinner date planned." Izaya lied, his forced smile widening. "And you say you're feeling fine, right? Then there's no reason for you to stay holed up in here. Get out, move around! It'll be good for you!" And as he said this, he stood and stretched lethargically.

Was that fondness in Shizuo's eyes as he watched him? Izaya allowed his smirk to show, too pleased with himself to bother suppressing it. Maybe it was a good thing that Shizuo had forgotten about him. They could start over, and Izaya could make Shizuo his in the way that he was meant to be. No more of that street-chasing crap, no matter how fun it was for him. Now Shizuo would be his solely. He wouldn't have to share his monster with the rest of the world anymore. He could be his to keep.

Izaya smiled and turned to face Shizuo again. The beast was watching him quizzically. "I'm afraid I have to go now, Shizu-chan. Why don't you get some more sleep? I'll be back later, don't worry! Bye-bye~" He waved cheerfully as he strolled over to the window, easing it open and hopping out.

Shizuo stared in bewilderment. That man was certainly a strange one. He laughed to himself and turned over on his side. Yes, he was a strange one, but he must have truly loved him before he lost his memories. Hopefully he could recover those feelings. He would hate to hurt him further.

The cool May air blew a gentle breeze through the window. It was a pleasant relief from the stifling heat in the room and he tilted his face into it, closing his eyes and breathing deeply. He would remember Izaya. He wouldn't let him down again.


End file.
